Why Traditional Work-Life Balance Is a Myth
The idea of achieving a perfect work-life balance is widely promoted, but for many entrepreneurs—and increasingly for professionals of all stripes—this ideal is more fiction than reality. Sun Ah Brock, CEO of LUX Decor and founder of MARU, shares that her own journey as a business leader and parent highlights the fundamental flaw in chasing this equilibrium: the expectation that you can give your best to every aspect of life, all at once, is simply unrealistic.
The Illusion of Perfect Balance
For years, the concept of work-life balance has been touted as the ultimate goal for professionals. It’s often depicted as a harmonious blend of career success, family time, personal hobbies, and self-care, all neatly balanced like a perfectly scaled seesaw. But the truth, as many entrepreneurs and working professionals have discovered, is far more complicated.
“Work-life balance is a myth,” Brock declares. “When you set yourself up for this unrealistic goal, it becomes like reaching for a golden ring that doesn’t exist.” Instead of chasing an unattainable equilibrium, Brock suggests embracing a different mindset—one that acknowledges the ever-changing nature of life.
Life in Seasons, Not Balance
Brock explains that life unfolds in distinct seasons, each with different priorities and demands. Early in her career, when her children were young and needed her attention, she deliberately chose to slow her business growth to prioritize her family. Now, with older children, she can pour more energy into new ventures. Each phase required different rhythms, commitments, and sacrifices.
The pursuit of a constant, even balance is like reaching for a golden ring that doesn’t exist. “Instead, look at life in seasons,” Brock advises, “which allows you to focus on what matters most right now. Embrace your current season.”
Intentional Choices Over Perfection
Rather than striving to “have it all” simultaneously, Brock advocates for making intentional choices and embracing your current priorities. During periods when her family was the focus, her business was in “maintenance mode,” growing slowly but offering flexibility. Conversely, during intense business-building phases, she worked long hours, but did so purposefully because those efforts matched her current goals.
The key is recognizing that you can’t excel at everything at once, and that’s perfectly acceptable. “It’s about making intentional choices,” Brock says. “You can’t pour your best energy into every area of your life simultaneously. And that’s okay.”
Adaptability, Support, and Community
Navigating these shifting seasons is easier when you have strong foundations and a supportive network that understands your values. Many entrepreneurs, Brock notes, are driven by a passion for their work, which often blurs the boundaries between work and leisure. In such communities, ambition is not stigmatized; instead, members are encouraged to embrace their passions without guilt or judgment.
Having a supportive network can make a significant difference. Whether it’s a spouse, a business partner, or a community of like-minded individuals, having people who understand your goals and challenges can help you navigate the ups and downs of your journey.
The Reality Behind “Having It All”
Social comparisons often fuel a false narrative about balance. Brock observes that entrepreneurs, especially women, might wonder how others “do it all,” but a closer look often reveals hidden support systems, like nannies, or choices that aren’t visible from the outside. The myth of effortless balance is just that—a myth that can lead to unnecessary guilt and self-doubt.
“No one talks about the trade-offs,” Brock says. “When you see someone excelling in one area, it’s often because they’ve made sacrifices in another. That’s okay. But pretending otherwise creates unrealistic expectations and unnecessary pressure.”
Entrepreneurship vs. the 9-to-5
Unlike traditional jobs with set hours and predictable routines, entrepreneurship rarely offers such neat boundaries. For Brock, working six days a week during the “springtime” of building something new doesn’t feel like a sacrifice; instead, her efforts are investments in a bigger vision. When your purpose is clear, the long hours are less about imbalance and more about commitment to what matters most in that season.
Entrepreneurship, by its very nature, requires flexibility and adaptability. It’s not about clocking in and out; it’s about pouring your heart and soul into something you believe in. And while this can be challenging, it can also be incredibly rewarding.
The Real “Magic”
Ultimately, Brock argues that the real magic of a fulfilling life isn’t found in achieving perfect balance, but in making conscious, value-driven choices about what to prioritize at any given time, and letting go of the guilt of not doing it all. By accepting and embracing each season—whether focused on family, business, health, or other pursuits—you set yourself up for satisfaction and success on your own terms.
“The ‘bounty’ comes when you give yourself permission to fully engage with the present,” Brock says, “rather than stretching yourself thin in pursuit of a mythical ideal.”
The Myth of the “Perfect” Entrepreneur
The notion of the “perfect” entrepreneur who effortlessly balances work and life is another layer of the myth that needs to be dismantled. Many entrepreneurs, especially women, face societal pressure to excel in both their professional and personal lives without showing any signs of struggle. Brock emphasizes that this narrative is not only unrealistic but also harmful, as it fosters feelings of inadequacy and failure when reality doesn’t meet these lofty expectations.
Redefining Success
Success, according to Brock, should be redefined on individual terms rather than societal standards. What matters most is whether your choices align with your personal values and goals. This means that success might look different in various seasons of life. For some, success might mean scaling a business while others prioritize raising a family or pursuing personal passions.
Embracing the Journey
Entrepreneurship is often portrayed as a linear journey with clear milestones, but the reality is far more fluid and unpredictable. Brock encourages entrepreneurs to embrace the journey, with all its twists and turns, rather than adhering to a rigid plan. This mindset allows for greater flexibility and the ability to adapt to changing circumstances, whether personal or professional.
The Power of Self-Compassion
One of the most critical lessons Brock shares is the importance of self-compassion. Many entrepreneurs are their own harshest critics, often feeling like they’re failing because they can’t meet the unrealistic standards of work-life balance. Brock urges entrepreneurs to be kinder to themselves, acknowledging that every decision, whether big or small, is a step forward in their unique journey.
Creating a Personal Definition of Balance
Rather than striving for a one-size-fits-all definition of balance, Brock suggests that entrepreneurs should create their own definition based on what works best for them. This might mean prioritizing certain aspects of life during specific seasons while letting go of others. The key is to define what balance means to you and make intentional choices that align with that definition.
The Role of Mindset in Achieving Fulfillment
Mindset plays a crucial role in achieving fulfillment, according to Brock. By shifting your mindset from one of scarcity and guilt to one of abundance and intention, you can approach life with greater confidence and clarity. This mindset shift allows entrepreneurs to focus on what truly matters, rather than getting bogged down by societal expectations.
Conclusion
The concept of achieving a perfect work-life balance is an unattainable ideal that can lead to unnecessary guilt and dissatisfaction. Embracing life as a series of seasons, where priorities shift based on current circumstances, offers a more realistic and fulfilling approach. By making intentional choices aligned with personal values and seeking support from a community or network, individuals can navigate the challenges of entrepreneurship and professional life more effectively. Redefining success on personal terms allows for a more adaptable and meaningful journey, free from the constraints of societal expectations.
FAQ
What does it mean when work-life balance is called a myth?
It suggests that the idea of perfectly balancing all aspects of life simultaneously is unrealistic. Life unfolds in seasons with varying priorities, making a one-size-fits-all balance impossible.
How can I manage different seasons of life effectively?
Focus on the current season’s priorities, make intentional decisions, and adjust your commitments accordingly. This approach allows you to concentrate on what matters most without guilt.
How can I handle feelings of guilt about not doing everything?
Recognize that excelling in all areas simultaneously is impossible. Prioritize intentionally and practice self-compassion, understanding that each season brings different focuses.
How can support systems help in managing work and life?
Support systems, like family or community networks, provide emotional and practical help, making it easier to navigate life’s challenges and reducing feelings of isolation.